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As a husband your purpose in marriage is to respect
your wife, even when you don’t feel like it. When a man gets
married he takes on the added responsibilities of marriage, which include
being respectful and caring. A husband is to love his wife as he would
In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives
as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no
one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ
does the church. (Ephesians 5:28-29)
He FEEDS and CARES for it just like Christ does the
church? This scriptural analogy here is showing husbands “how to love
their wives” – in the same way Christ would feed and care for his
church. Wow! It is a big responsibility and sometimes a challenging one at
that, but God designed husbands for this purpose in marriage.
If a husband is not respecting his wife in the way he
should, then could it be because he is not respecting himself? Usually
this means a husband is mistreating himself somehow with too much work, or
too much womanizing, or too much pornography, or too much drugs, or too
much alcohol, or too much resentment, too much selfishness, too much
control over his wife, or too much bitterness from within.
All of these things would keep a husband from truly
respecting and caring for his wife properly. If we don’t love ourselves,
how can we love another?
Respect is a principle that supports and sustains
many aspects of marriage. If a husband respects and regards his wife with
high esteem it will make her feel good about her role as a woman and of
being his wife. Marriage will undoubtedly have its troubles, but if you
remember the principle “to treat your wife the way you would like to be
treated” then most marriage problems can be resolved amicably before
they get out of hand.
If a husband totally disregards his purpose to love
his wife because he disrespects himself then he will need inner healing
before he can learn to love and respect his wife properly – the way God
intended for a man to love his wife. Respect is an important component of
marriage, which keeps it flourishing with abundance no matter what issues
When a woman gets married she now has a new
responsibility, to love and respect her husband, even when she
doesn’t feel like it. Your
whole purpose as a wife is to be the loving woman to your man that God
wants you to be. Marriage is not just about a wife’s feelings and what
she wants and needs, but what both husband and wife want and need as a
whole and together in the marriage!
The principle I am just about to tell you should be
posted on every mirror and refrigerator in a married couples home so they
don’t forget it. Here is a great and awesome principle for your
marriage. If you study it, remember it, and apply it into your marriage,
you will understand and regard the principle of respect with more
“Marriage is not about two separate individuals
doing their own thing, but about two intertwined individuals working
together to be one whole. A
wife is her husband’s other half and a husband is his wife’s other
half. Together a husband and a wife create “one flesh” in the
For this reason a man will leave his father and
mother and be united to his wife, and they will become “one flesh”.
A wife should respect the leadership position of her
husband, encouraging him to become all that he can be for the marriage and
to God. A husband should love and care for his wife in the same way he
would care for himself, encouraging her to become all that she can be for
the marriage and to God. God wants us to live righteously by having a
right relationship with Him first, so we can have a right relationship
with the person we married.
A healthy marriage is made up of compassion, submission, respect and forgiveness. Did you notice that I didn’t even use the word “love”? That’s because all of the above constitutes love. When you demonstrate these character traits with others you are essentially turning these words into loving action. Love is being submissive, compassionate, respectful and forgiving.
Forgiveness is Love
When you forgive your spouse for something they have done against you or the marriage you are feeling love for them. That’s why you forgive because you love them! Do you see how that works? Forgiveness is saying, “I want to work this out with you. Therefore I will not hold in grudges or resentment because I have forgiven you”. Now because you have chosen to love through forgiveness you can get passed the pain and move on in your marriage.
Submission is Love
Contrary to ignorant, popular culture, submission isn’t being a doormat. It’s surrendering yourself to your spouse. The only way that submitting to your own husband would make you a doormat is if you allow it to be so in your attitude. It’s true there are some husband’s that treat their wives with disrespect but that is something else altogether. No woman should take any kind of abuse that would harm her own faith in God, period!
Did you know that even husband’s should submit to their wives, but not in the same way? In fact, a God-fearing husband ought to be making sacrifices and surrendering himself to his wife on a daily basis through his headship position. Jesus submitted and surrendered His life for our life—this is the same way husbands are to submit to their wives. A husband ought to be putting aside his own interests in order to properly care for his wife according to his God-given position.
Submit to one another out of reverence to Christ. (NIV
Love is Being Respectful
I think disrespect is a major problem couples face in marriage. Public schools or parents don’t teach the importance of respect for others anymore. Many of these youths grow up with selfish attitudes where they believe relationships including marriage should be catered to their every whim. But this is not reality. If you go into marriage with this kind of attitude you will surely be unhappy. I’ve seen this predicament between couples over and over again.
Happiness comes from understanding how to treat others with respect because you have already treated yourself well. What do I mean by that? I mean you have to grow out from your past hurts, addictions, resentments, and bad attitudes first, before you will understand how to love (respect) others appropriately.
Couples want and need to feel good about their position in marriage. For instance, if a wife understands from society that being submissive to her husband makes her a doormat then she is going to do whatever it takes to be the boss of her house. If a husband understands that being the spiritual head means he must become some religious fanatic who has to go to Church every Sunday and Wednesday, then he may decide to bow out of his headship/leadership responsibilities. Church can get downright boring at times. God should never be made boring because it is Him that gives us life!
In reality neither of the above is truth. It doesn’t come from the Word of God. But try and teach people something that has been drilled into their heads since they were kids. In reality a wife is exactly the opposite of a doormat when she submits to her husband’s love for her. She becomes the queen of her home. And a husband does not need to ever walk into a church building to be a man of God! In fact it may deter him in his willingness to have a growing relationship with His Savior The Christ. Why that is would take another article, but maybe you can figure it out.
In reality, by studying and reading the Word of God in the privacy of your own home, and talking to God through your personal relationship with Jesus, your teacher, you are the church! Wherever men and women of God go they bring the church with them in spirit and in truth. You don’t have to “go to church” to be saved! Worshipping God is in Spirit not in a church building. This is not to say that you cannot “go to church” if you want, but it is not a part of being saved. Church does not make somebody a Christian—it is what’s in the heart.
Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshippers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshippers the Father seeks. God is spirit and his worshippers must worship in spirit and in truth. (John 4:24)
Couples ought to be respecting each other for trying
to do what is right. They ought to be supporting and encouraging one
another in the Word of God and helping each other to be all they can be in
the respective positions given to them by God. This is love! This is
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace (Ephesians 4:2-3)
What if I told you there was a supplement to get rid of fat without
having to exercise? That you could eat a pepperoni pizza and the fat from
the pepperoni would not absorb into your body causing fat and cellulite
buildup? You would think I’m off my rocker, wouldn’t you? Instead the
fat from the pepperoni would bind itself onto the prickly pear cactus and
be excreted through the natural process of elimination. Sounds too good to
be true, doesn’t it?
How Does Prickly Pear Work?
Prickly Pear Cactus is first dried into a powder.
This prickly pear powder is then mixed in with other herbs to create an
organic dietary supplement that has been clinically tested and proven to
fight stubborn fat. Powered by NeOpuntia and the It Works beauty
products. It Works has created a proprietary blend called Advanced
Formula Fat Fighter. Fat Fighter delivers powerful results!
The Prickly Pear Cactus or Opuntia ficus-indica creates two types of dietary fiber, NeOfiber and NeOmicel. These fibers work together and bind with the fat from the food you eat. This binding process creates an insoluble gel in the stomach where it passes through the digestive tract and eventually eliminated naturally. There are virtually no side effects; it’s safe to use and non-habit forming.
If I Take Fat Fighter Can I Eat Whatever I Want
And Still Lose Fat and Cellulite?
Some people don’t eat as well as they would like because they don’t have time for a healthy sit down lunch or dinner. To counteract the unhealthy and fattening food they take the Fat Fighter supplement. But supplements are called supplements for a very good reason—to supplement or complement other beneficial methods.
Think of Fat Fighter as an assistant. If your two year old has a life vest on in the swimming pool does that mean you wouldn’t keep your eye on them while they are in the pool? No, it means you would still keep a close eye on them but you would also supplement with the life vest just in case. It is the same way with Advanced Formula Fat Fighter. It’s only another method to assist you in your weight loss journey.
Supplements of any kind should always be used in conjunction with a good daily diet and exercise. On those days when you really can’t sit down to a healthy meal, the supplements will come in handy to grab onto that fatty meal and get rid of it for you. But we should never replace healthy eating or exercise with a supplement. Think of Advanced Formula Fat Fighter as another stepping-stone toward your weight loss journey.
Ask me how you can get Advanced Formula Fat Fighter At Incredible wholesale Prices!
What Exercise Works Best With The Fat Fighter
The best way to burn fat (calories) is through exercise, and any cardiovascular exercise will help to burn off the fat. One of the best exercises for anyone in any shape and size is brisk walking. I don’t think there is any better exercise on your joints, mental and emotional health then getting outdoors with a friend or spouse and doing some fast walking.
If you aren’t used to walking very far or fast, start out slow and only walk one mile. After two weeks walk a little bit faster and walk two miles. Walking three miles briskly every day will keep the fat off. It will take anywhere between 45-minutes to 1-hour to walk three miles, depending on how fast your pace is.
Watch one-minute video about Fat Fighter.
Find Out More About Fat Fighter: http://www.heavenministries.com/Health.htm
Read testimonials of others who are taking Advanced
Formula Fat Fighter.
Why do we gain weight? We gain weight because we are
eating more calories than we burn. There really is a more simple way to
lose weight than to “go on a diet”.
Dieting is no fun! Why deprive yourself of food or feel guilty for
eating when you’re hungry? That’s not right! Reduced calorie diets
Eat Only Whole Foods And You Will Lose Weight
It’s very important to feed our body well. By
“well” I mean to feed it real, whole foods. This is what the body
craves. The body craves natural, wholesome food. And here is what’s so
neat about it. When your body realizes it is being given what it needs, it
runs much more efficiently, giving us more energy—energy to burn off the
food we eat so we lose weight! What
else happens to our body when it is fed natural, whole foods? Let’s take
* All of the organs function quite efficiently, working together to give YOU, the person inside your body a good physical, mental, and spiritual outlook.
* Natural (organic) foods burn more efficiently than denatured foods do.
* Whole foods keep your body in balance because elimination occurs more readily and naturally.
* Irritable bowl syndrome symptoms go away when the body is fed good food
* Your body loses fat because of all of the above!
* Skin quality improves greatly because your body is
less toxic, plus cells are receiving valuable nutrition.
What Happens When We Eat Denatured Food?
* The body becomes confused and doesn’t know what to do with the substances added to denatured food.
* Toxins build up because the body is swamped with substances it can’t metabolize through digestion
* Fibreless, denatured foods cause constipation, boils, rashes, allergies, acne, potbelly, obesity, sugar spikes, IBS, hemorrhoids, gluten intolerance, emotional issues, and more.
* Organs begin to stop functioning normally, causing
bladder infections, liver disease, pancreas issues, IBS, clogged arteries,
colon cancer, and more.
Pesticides, herbicides, additives, colorings, dyes,
fake sugars, preservatives, and chemicals overtime all leave a trail of
toxins in your body in the form of weight gain, sleep disturbances, sugar
spikes, aches and pains, and digestive disorders that become disease and
cancer if something is not done to cleanse the system and change the diet.
God did not build our body to tolerate food that was
not invented yet. We had already been given all the food we would need for
perfect health. He knew that man would build factories and destroy the
food through denaturing. But God gave us a mind that can think and reason,
for this purpose, so we can choose to lead a healthy eating lifestyle.
No one is standing over us at gunpoint making us eat
boxed, packaged, canned, frozen denatured food products. We can choose to
buy only whole, natural ingredients and cook! Did you know that fatness is
enabled in this country through the denaturing of foods!
I’m telling you, if you want to lose weight and feel good, with no guilt trips, than go all-natural! Give your body the food it was meant to receive and your body will reward you with physical and mental well being.
Dealing With Difficult In-laws
Question: My father in law and I differ. I have on numerous occasions held my tongue and not said anything when he rants about the way I say things, where I am going, why I exist, and everything else that I can even breathe. He never says anything positive and is always filling in my words and others too. I think he thinks women are small and insignificant. I also feel he does not and has never liked me. I am mainly concerned when he mouths me that my children will notice and learn that from him. I don't think confronting him would do a thing, because he is overbearing and will hear only what he wants. I love my husband, but not being able to be around his father. I would enjoy getting to know him, but right now I am scared to say anything, because he is so overbearing and manipulative I don't think I could say what I mean. Also, for example: how to handle him when he starts making statements about me being crazy and worrying and stuff. Please reply something.
Guidance: It sounds like your father in law has a problem within himself, and with communicating with others, and expressing himself in a good way. This makes him come off as a mean old ogre. This is a fault that some people have, and the funny thing is, they don't even realize it when they are being rude and disrespectful. It's like the dad on Everybody Loves Raymond; he is very disrespectful and speaks down to his wife and sons all the time. It is funny because we know it is just a comedy and they are acting, but there are folks like that in real life! And unfortunately, there is not much you can do about it. They have to be able to SEE their own behavior before they will change.
Since we know that your father in-law cannot change by you telling him he is disrespectful, or difficult to get along with, then what you have to do is tell him in other ways through what you do (your reaction) when he talks down to you. If your in-laws talk down to you, or treat you with contempt, I would simply not talk to them. Then they will ask you why you’re not talking to them, and this gives you the opportunity to tell them that you have decided for your own well-being, and your children, that you will not communicate with anyone who disrespects and or trespasses against your spirit. Then, smile and walk away.
You see, right now, you have unknowingly made a pattern with your father in-law. He knows how you’re going to react before he even says anything to you. And by allowing your father in law to talk to you in a negative way he will continue to do so. He is taking advantage of your kindness by making himself feel better in the way he is treating you.
Since you did not give me any particulars, I can only guess at how he is behaving towards you. You have to learn how to detach from his emotional overbearing abuse and let it roll off you. Otherwise if you don't and you continue to allow his rudeness to bother you, it will disrupt your own personal spiritual growth and well being, and that is not right.
Telling someone you will not talk with them until they can talk to you in a respectful manner is being assertive, not mean or unloving. We absolutely have to be assertive with people who want to walk all over us, especially family members that may come over and visit periodically. Don’t be afraid of stepping on toes. On the contrary when we are assertive with people, they actually respect us more for it.
Below are some examples of how we may be more assertive with others through our communication with them. At first it may seem difficult to behave with such detachment, but once you do it, you will feel so much better, and it won't give people a negative toe into your spirit.
Father in law says: "You do not know anything about marriage, do you? If you did then maybe you and Tom wouldn’t be fighting all the time."
You say: Say nothing to this rude comment. Get up and leave the room or leave the house if you’re at his house.
Mother in law says: "Why do you always cook those foods for your family? You need to cook this and this for them?"
You say: "Thank you." Smile. "I will look into that."
Mother in-law says: “The turkey will taste better and not be dry if you cook it like this."
You say: "I appreciate that and we would love to come over to your house for thanksgiving next year and taste turkey the way you cook it. "
Mother in law: "You shouldn’t clean the house only once a week. You really need to do it this way?"
You say: "Thanks for that" smile. "I will look into that."
Mother in-law says: "What is wrong with you, why did you walk away from me when I asked you a question?"
You say: "Oh that?" smile. "I have decided that I will not take verbal abuse or disrespect from anyone, including you. But if you would like to talk to me in a nice manner, I would be happy to sit down with you and discuss the issue with you." Smile.
Mother in-law says: "Jane, you aren’t a very bright girl. I don't know why my son married you with so many other fish in the sea."
You say: Say absolutely nothing to this comment. She does not deserve a reply from you. Get up and walk away.
Father in-law says: Jane, you do not know how to talk to people. Why don't you learn how to talk right”?
You say: Nothing. Get up and walk away. Leave his home.
It is not a good idea to let your children hear their grandfather speak to you in condescending ways, you're right. So… if and when he is disrespecting you, or speaking down to you, simply do not have any part of it. Don't give in to the temptation to fuss and argue with contemptible in-laws.
You are a good person, and certainly do not have to allow someone tell you who or what you are. He is basically molding you for his own angry purpose and it is wrong. He is defining you under his own microscope and that is wrong, but the problem is he doesn't care and you cannot change him. So...in the mean time, try to do what I said above. Detach from his abuse.
Right now I can see that he is hurting your ego and self worth as a person and no one needs that. I suggest that you talk with your husband and unite on how you BOTH will handle this issue. Make sure that you will get your husband’s support in this. He needs to agree to detach from his dad when he is belittling and disrespecting his wife. This is VERY important. Only then through the both of you, will your father in-law maybe, see how he is treating his daughter in-law.
As hard as it may be, I encourage you to try to forgive your father in-law for being that way with you. It could very well be that your father in-law is hurting inside and having other emotional and or physical problems that are bothering him. And also it could be that he does not only treat you with disrespect but everyone who is around him. Pray for him and ask God to give you the peace of mind to detach with love whenever you need to.
In all things shewing thyself a pattern of good works: in doctrine shewing the incorruptness, gravity, sincerity, Sound speech, that cannot be condemned; that he that is of the contrary part may be ashamed having no evil thing to say of you. ( Titus 2:7,8 KJV)
Until Another Day!
Take Care and God Bless!
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