To An Alcoholic: Donít Ask The Alcoholic
It can be very difficult being married to an
alcoholic, especially if the alcoholic is verbally abusive when they
drink. Most alcoholics are. I was an abusive alcoholic and my husband
used to record me when I got abusive with him. The next day he would
make me listen to myself verbally abuse him.
I was awful! He never once told me to stop verbally abusing him,
instead he learned to detach from it.
Many frustrated spouses end up trying to
control the alcoholic. They want to start telling the alcoholic how to
behave. They want to tell the alcoholic to stop drinking. They want to
make the alcoholic treat them better.
They want promises from the alcoholic because they canít take
But in all honesty weíre only spinning our
wheels. The wheels keep going round and round and we still havenít
managed to get the alcoholic to change! Why? Itís because the
alcoholic cannot keep promisesóthey are addicted to alcohol. If they
did not have a drinking problem then they would be able to keep their
promises. When we expect the alcoholic to make promises we will be
greatly disappointed. Donít expect and you wonít end up being
When disappointment sets in it makes our living
environment even more difficult. Know that the alcoholic you live with
will most certainly break almost every single promise they make to you
just because that is how addiction worksóthey are under the influence
of alcohol. When you tell an alcoholic to do something you may as well
be talking to a brick wall. A bad as that seems, itís the truth.
The ironic thing is the alcoholic may sincerely
want to changeóthey may genuinely try to not treat you bad, but once
that alcohol goes down their throat and into their blood stream, its
like telling a snail to hurry up. Sadly, when the alcoholic realizes
they canít keep their promises, guilt sets in and they drink even
more. Addiction is a funny thing; it has such a strong hold on the
addict that it canít be given up until the alcoholic is ready.
The best thing a loved one can do when living with
an alcoholic is not to ask the alcoholic to make promises you know they
canít keep and donít expect too much from the alcoholic. Donít let
your expectations get to high, youíll only be let down. Instead learn
to detach from the behaviors of the alcoholic and rescue you from the
emotional roller coaster today! Here is a great video to help you to
learn how to detach from the alcoholic with love. http://youtu.be/4oBEvfpCzDQ
How Do I Detach From An Alcoholic Spouse? This ebook is packed full of excellent information that will help you to break away from the addiction and to begin to live your life for YOU, plus help the alcoholic at the same time!
Do you want
to help your spouse get sober?
Than stop trying to control every aspect of the addiction. Only when you
stop trying to fix your spouse and take care of YOU can you be a
valuable help to the alcoholic. Do you often feel like you are drowning with the
Do you feel sad, panicky, depressed, stressed out, helpless, and
emotionally and spiritually sick? Donít go under with the alcoholic,
swim quickly back to the shore! This
eBook shows you what you need to do to rescue YOU from the traps of