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Teens Need To
"Show" They Can Be Trusted
Copyright 2008 Heaven Ministries - Angie Lewis
Parents don't want to hear a bunch of empty
promises. They don't want to sit home and worry about where you are, or
who you're with, or what you're doing. They want to be involved in your
life.
Some teens feel restricted and want more
freedom. They fight with their parents and rebel to gain freedom.
Many teenagers don't understand that parents keep a tight rein on them
because of love - they don't want anything bad to happen to you.
Perhaps they have experienced bad things happening to someone they know
or maybe those bad things happened to them when they were children.
Regardless, parents discipline and place rules and restrictions on your
so-called freedom because they love you! They are doing their job!
Parents who go the extra mile to make sure all the
"eyes are dotted" and all of the "tees are crossed" will have safer, happier
teenagers. Teenagers, for the most part, actually want to be disciplined
"with love", that is. Take out the love part and you have full
blown exasperation.
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead,
bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (Ephesians
6:4)
Teenagers, why would you not want to show that you
can be trusted? You've heard the saying, I'm sure, that "talk is
cheap", right? Well, its very true. You must show that you can be
trusted by doing what your parents ask of you. They have your best
interests at heart, (most of the time) and they do know what's best for
you. The best way you can show that you can be trusted is by obeying
their rules and enforcements.
For additional encouragement in this area, I have
outlined 7-ways to reestablish trust with your parents. This list should
get you started on the road to winning back their trust once and for
all.
7 Ways To Reestablish Trust With Your Parents
Are your parents hurting over something you did wrong, and now they are having a difficult time trusting you again? Do you regret what you did? You’re not alone.
It happens to almost every teenager - we make stupid mistakes and then
regret them, but now we've lost trust with our parents and that hurts.
What can you do?
1. Show That You're Sorry
Often times just saying you’re sorry doesn’t seem quit enough. In that case, show you are sorry by applying actions to that sorry. If you are sorry, you will be willing to cooperate with your parents. As we all know saying sorry is one thing, actually being sorry will show through in your actions.
If you have been grounded or restricted just do the time without
complaining. Understand it will also help you in the long run to not
cross over the boundaries next time - it will make you stronger.
2. Reestablish Trust
Be willing to do whatever it is you need to do to prove that you have learned your lesson. Reestablishing the bonds of trust with your parents isn’t always easy, but it is an absolute must if you want the freedoms back that you once were entrusted with.
Admit you made a mistake - show you have in fact learned your
lesson.
3. Cooperation
Cooperate with your parents on all levels. If that means losing some of your privacy over it, then be it. Examples of that might be having a GPS tracking system installed in your car, or maybe moving your computer from your bedroom to the living room. Ask you parents what it is you can do that will help them to trust you again.
Your willingness to do what it takes will definitely help them to trust
you once again.
4. Be Open and Honest
Bring everything out in the open. Let them know why you did what you did, and why you won’t do it again. Open communication is very important with your parents right now. If you are holding something back, chances are they will
find out about it sooner or later. Parents always seem to find out
stuff, so you may as well tell them now and get it over with. Be willing to have heart to heart talks and let your mom and dad know the people you are hanging out with and what you do in your spare time after school and when you are away from home.
5. Be Trustworthy
Show that you are trustworthy. Understand all that might be expected by you and be willing to fulfill those obligations. By showing your parents the extra effort on your part it will show them that you really can be trusted again.
Trust goes along way in our actions. Come home a little bit before your
schedule time; go the extra mile to meet your parents trust expectations
of you.
6. Learn From Your Wrong(s)
Perhaps the most important aspect of showing responsibility is growing from your mistakes. This is how you learn and mature. You should never linger in your wrongs, because that is not what God wants you to do. I believe that making mistakes is one of the ways you learn in life and through them all you can become the dependable and responsible young person that God wants you to be.
Mistakes don't make us a failure mistakes make us successful.
7. Be Repentant
Pray about it daily and ask for Christ’s forgiveness. Stay focused at all times on Christ Jesus and ask Him to lift any heavy burdens from your heart and mind. If you are struggling with temptations or other
major issues and or difficulties it is always best to tell your parents so they can support you in whatever trials you are going through.
Your parents may be disappointed in your past actions but they will
still be there for you to support and encourage you through whatever
difficulties you may be experiencing, if you talk to them. But if you
don't talk to them, it will be a lot harder on you and them in the long
run.
“ I, even, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more,” says the LORD. (Isaiah 43:25
NIV)
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