Why does the bible say for the wife to submit
to the husband and the husband to love the wife? What
does it really mean?
In marriage both husband and wife are called to submit
to one another. (Ephesians 5:21) For the husband that means putting
aside his own interests and desires and caring for his wife. Mutual
submission between husband and wife sustains order and increases love
and respect for each other.
For the husband who is appointed the spiritual leader
and counselor in the home means for him to be in service to the Lord.
Just as Christ served His own disciples by washing their feet, so is the
husband to serve his wife. This is using Christ's example appropriately
as it was intended.
Unfortunately many woman think the act of "giving
in" to their husbands somehow makes them feel inferior or
inadequate and not in control of who they are. But this is not
true. When a woman allows her Christ-honoring husband to lead the
household she is putting her faith in God. and respecting the role of
her husband as well. Husbands are the covering and protection of the
Submitting to your partner is a choice that we all
need to make. When you do submit to one another, you're not giving
up your individuality or your rights as a person, but are respecting one
|When a husband orders that his wife
submit to him, then it's not true submission. Taking advantage of
scripture and using it out of context as a mere tool for
intimidating and hurting your wife is wrong and leads to resentment.
Christ-honoring man will not take advantage of his leadership role and a
Christ-honoring wife will not try to undermine her husbands leadership
Submitting to one another shouldn't be made into a
control-power issue. If it becomes as such, both parties are not
honoring themselves and more importantly, God.
When we use the scripture incorrectly to take
advantage of our partners, both parties will resist and the marriage
ends up going nowhere fast. Marriage is one institution, therefore there
is no room for disagreement during major crisis or the decision making
Giving in to the authority of your husband doesn't
mean you have lost your rights as a woman or individuality.
Submission is being respectful. Just as the wife
submits to her husband so should the husband submit to the Lord.
authority matters, a woman can disagree with her husband, but yet still
approve of who he is.
may also have her own opinions and believe the way she feels and still
be who she is.
When a woman rebels against her husbands authority, it
makes him feel less of a man. When this happens, he will become even
more controlling in matters of difference. This is very harmful towards
Many feminists have a hard time submitting to their
husbands authority, or any man for that matter, because of mistrust (of
men) and low self esteem. When we have to prove ourselves to others in
such a head strong way, it is because we feel we are lacking in
other areas of our life.
|| Let's look
at it another way and pretend that this scripture was never written.
There is only one
captain to every ship and with that ship there is only one first mate.
The captain needs his first mate, she is the one who reads the
navigational charts and brings out the sails and brings in the lines.
She is there for him when storms come and waves are washing up onto the
deck. She cooks for him to bring him energy during the storm because
while she is sleeping, he is still steering the ship through the storm
to safety. The husband is the helmsman and the wife is to be the first
The first mate is a helpmate beyond belief, that
without the first mate to help in times of need and decision making, the
ship would sink. And the first mate needs the captain for without a
captain to steer the ship, there would be no destination-no purpose to
why you were together in the first place.
If both the captain and the first mate try and take
the helm and lead the ship to separate shores, the ship ends up adrift
because both are steering in separate directions.
When we rebel against our husband's divine authority,
we are actually rebelling against the will of God.
The bottom line is, someone has to be the head of the
family and in nature, history and scripture this has always been the
male. God gives him this position not of demanding ruler-ship, but of
responsibility and honor.
Men, Love your wives with the wisdom God gave you
and she will submit out of her enduring love for you!
copyright © 2004 Heaven Minsitries