How To Strengthen Your Marriage

Heaven Ministries Copyright © 2008

Below I have mentioned seven ways to strengthen your marriage. I think we have to “be more” in our marriage for it to strengthen. We need to “be more” for our spouse than what we are now being. A strong built marriage takes effort from us! It is our willingness to “be more” which strengthens marriage. Let’s be more!

1) Be More Willing
If your marriage is weak and needs strengthened then it will be the strength of you that will decide to put in the effort where it is needed in the marriage. Where is your marriage weakest? Build that area back up through your own spiritual resolve in God. Don’t wait for your spouse to do it. It takes willingness and effort to work on something you want. Be more and watch your marriage be more too. 

2) Be More Intimate
Intimacy is the first aspect of marriage that disintegrates when couples are going through difficulties. They stop spending time with each other and doing things together, which is intimacy and builds intimacy! Find fun things to do that you both enjoy. It doesn’t matter what it is. Take walks together having conversations that entail more than “what is for dinner” and “did you take out the garbage”? Be more for each other through communication and time spent together. 

3) Be More Humble
Learning to “give in” and humble oneself during a heated argument can actually benefit the marriage, if you do it right. First, let your spouse know that you feel differently on the subject, but that arguing over it is not helping the issue at hand. Let your spouse know that they are important to you and so is the marriage, therefore you are going to “give in” for the sake of the marriage and what it means to you. Just so you know, most arguments are born out of stubbornness, arrogance and intolerance of one another’s views, and are VERY detrimental to the marriage. It kills intimacy and trust. 

4) Be More Compromising
If more couples learned how to scratch each others backs instead of just getting their own back scratched, I believe there would be much less divorce in this country. How do we compromise with a stubborn, selfish person? First, give in, and then explain yourself at a later time when anger is not flared up, or learn to communicate properly by using the “I feel” words rather than “finger pointing” and “name calling” words. 

5) Be More Appreciative
When your wife comes home from a long day at work and then cooks a hot, nutritious meal, I hope that you let her know how much you appreciate her efforts in the kitchen. When your husband has been working all day and comes home and needs to fix the kitchen sink pipes or fix whatever, I hope that you give him a big hug and smile and tell him how much you appreciate all his repair efforts around the home. If you don’t, then I suggest you start. Appreciation goes a long way with people. It makes them be better at their jobs, and at home, and in their personal relationships with others when they feel appreciated. 

6) Be More Accepting
We all have faults; there is no way getting around it. We cannot change our spouses bad habits and faults for them, so why let them bother you? Learn to just let your spouse be. They have to be willing to change for themselves. This does not mean to accept your spouse if they are obviously sinning against the marriage. It means that if you look at yourself first, can you even throw the first stone? 

7) Be More Respectful
You would not believe how often we disrespect the person we married. Maybe ten, twenty times a day. This is an attitude problem – a sideways glance, a dirty look, a sigh of resentment, a negative slur, an angry insult, and demeaning speech. These actions are disrespectful, but smiling and walking away is not. Try it next time.