How To Treat Your
Husband Like A Man
Are you treating your husband like a man or like a
little boy? The best way to treat your man like a man is by respecting
who he is and his God-given position in the marriage. If you treat him
as if he were one of the kids he will feel disrespected. No man wants to
be married to his mother, but thatís what it feels like when a wife
constantly nags, complains, or demands things of her husband for one
reason or another.
You see I used to do this with my husband. I was a
needy, demanding, bossy, and controlling wife. I expected things from my
husband because I was not happy with myself. Unhappy wives and husbands
become needy and spongy with each other when they feel they are in lack
of something or when they fear something. Only Our Creator can fill the
lack within us. We must ask Him into our lives and allow Him to lead us.
A big part of the problem is that some men give
their wives good reason to treat them like little boys. If you donít
assert your position as that of Ďbeing the man of the homeĒ your
wife will automatically take up your position in the marriage as if it
is her position. A man likes to be the king in his home, but if the wife
is already acting as if she is the king where does that leave the
husband? The queen? I hope not.
ÖFor the husband is the head of the wife as
Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the savior.
Why do some husbands have affairs? Is the grass
really greener on the other side of the fence? A real man doesnít want
to be scolded like a child. He doesnít want to be rejected and he
doesnít want to be bossed around and told what to do. He wants to be
treated like a man. If a
husband is not being respected at home the chances of him having an
affair, emotional or physical are more prevalent. Iím not condoning
affairs because they are wrong? How a wife treats her husband doesnít
justify a husband having an affair.
Did you know that God created the man with the
spiritual and physical ability to protect his family? Itís instinctive
for the man to be a protector, overseer, and captainĒ. But if wives
arenít allowing their husbands to take care of them, because they
think that they can take care of themselves then essentially you are
disrespecting him and his position as the man of the marriage.
Spiritually speaking, husbands have been given the authority by
God to lead the home with loving influence and guidance.
Wives submit to your husbands as to the Lord.
If you are having a difficult time submitting to
your husband, it is because you have not submitted your life to God.
Before a woman can actually understand the logistics of submission she
must submit her own life to the Lord. Understand that God did not make
the man better than the woman in any way, only different. Letís take a
For example, if you were being robbed, who would
grab the gun and protect the family, you or your husband? Would it seem
odd to you if your husband said for you to get the gun while he hides in
the closet? It would. In fact your husband would probably tell you to go
in the room with the children and protect (nurture) them, while he
confronts the robber. It is totally instinctive for the man to grab the
gun, while the women waits in the shadows with her kids. No man in his
right mind is going to make his wife protect him.
This is just one way in which God created the sexes
different. So, my point is, why in an emergency is it okay for the man
to be a man, but when it is during regular home life, with no emergency,
the wife bosses and controls her husband around like he is a child?
Where is the respect in that?
Letís take a look at another scenario. A wife
leaves her children, husband, and duties of the home everyday to work
under another man, her employer. Pretty soon co-workers begin making
flirtatious advances at her. Every day men at her work are making her
feel good about herself. Her husband is not making her feel good about
herself, in fact the marriage is strained from her being tired and
overworked. If this woman is vulnerable or not really committed to her
marriage what do you think is going to happen? Thatís right, sheís
going to have an affair.
I have to ask this. Why is she not home under her
husbandís guidance and protection? How can a man protect his wife when
she is leading her own life outside the bounds of the marriage? Wives
working out of the home, whether they work for women or men is a major
reason for marital breakups, especially when husband and wife have no
moral standards or codes established for the marriage. Neither one of
them is taking their God given positions in the marriage seriously.
The feminist movement and the ways of society has
created some confused women to treat their husbands with disrespect-its
an attitude that is fostered through encouraging women to be all that
they can be, without the aid of a man. And thatís fine, but if she is
married is it still fine? How can you treat your husband like the man of
the home/marriage when you are already behaving as if you are the man?
humble and gentle; be patient bearing with one another in love. Make
every effort to keep the unity of the spirit through the bond of peace.
Angie Lewis ĖHeaven Ministries