Five Wise Ways To Save Your Marriage
Copyright 2009 Heaven Ministries ~ Angie Lewis
There are many things that couples can do to save
their marriage. Although circumstances for each marriage are different,
what Iím going to discuss in this article applies to every marriage.
1. Be Willing To Work on Your Marriage
Couples need to be willing to pick up the pieces
and work with their spouse. Humble yourselves to each other. So many
times couples blame one another for the disarray of the marriage because
they are hurting inside. No one wants to feel hurt, pain and suffering.
But what happens when we donít even try to forgive? The broken pieces
of the marriage remain on the floor!
If no one is willing to pick up the pieces the
marriage will remain broken. Negative emotions, past baggage, guilt and
vulnerability will be carried with you into the next marriage or
relationship. Donít think that remarriage is going to make you happy
or solve your problems. Thatís not reality. The reality is you can
pick up the pieces and resolve your martial problems and be a better
marriage partner because of it.
2. Change Attitude From ďDonít CareĒ to
So how do you change an attitude from ďdonít
careĒ to committed? You just do it. Understand that you probably
walked into the marriage with non-commitment, even though your feelings
told you otherwise. This day and age, many of us have not been taught
the value of marriage, and many of us donít know what the bible says
about marriage. This ďdonít careĒ attitude about the sanctity of
marriage is what is killing marriages and families. What does God say
about marriage? God says marriage is for a lifetime.
3. Forgive and Encourage Daily
Realize itís not just the big things that need
forgiveness, but the everyday small things too. Forgiveness works very
closely with acceptance. In marriage couples need to accept and tolerate
the person they married. Forgive your husband for leaving the toilet
seat up and watching too much television. Forgive your wife for not
being a good cook or house cleaner. Do these small things really mean an
end to the marriage?
We all have areas that need improved on. The best
way to improve on ourselves is to encourage each other. Does that seem
backwards to you? It is not backwards when you look at the big picture.
When you encourage the person you married, you will be lifting them up
in spirit, and in turn, they will see the positive aspects in you and do
the same. Couples absolutely need to encourage one another every day.
Instead of finding fault and bringing each other down, find the good in
one another and bring each other up.
4. Appreciate Each Other More
This area in marriage is greatly lacking. Do you
want to know why? Some of us take our marriage and everything in it for
granted. Some of us never stop to think about all that our spouse does
for us. Do we expect too much from the person we married. We somehow
think that if only they would do this, or change to be like that, and
then we would be happy. But this kind of thinking is not reality, is it?
Stop and notice your marriage. When was the last
time you told your spouse how much you appreciate them for all they do?
Donít let the doldrums of marriage make you emotionally lazy. Show
your appreciation in acts of kindness and love every single day of your
5. Realize Who The Creator of Marriage Is
Jesus Christ has already laid out the architectural
design for a Christian marriage. He has given us the wisdom and the
knowledge to live marriage Godís way! If we manage our marriage under
our own understanding it will have difficulties and possibly fail. We
absolutely have to put God first so we can understand how to love the
person we married in the ways of Christ.
God is the Master Architect of marriage and for a happy marriage
we need to base our actions on His design.